Consistency with Inconsistency
Peyton's health and developmental progress has been all over the place since day 1 of birth. This has made it difficult to know what is coming or what kind of day she is going to have. For example, literally after thinking to myself how great Peyton has been doing with reflux, she threw up in her bed this morning.
"She keeps me on my toes" is an extreme understatement.
Peyton's complete list of diagnoses consist of: --Wolf-Hirschhorn Syndrome -Developmental Delays -Intellectual Disabilities -Poor Growth/Failure to thrive -Strabismus -Epilepsy --GERD (Reflux) --ASD (atrial septal defect) --Congenital Lobar Emphysema --Milk Protein Allergy --Low Immunity --G-tube placement --Port placement
When I write that list down and really look at it, I can feel my chest tighten and my thoughts race. "What else is coming?" Peyton is super unpredictable and I have to be ready at all times for anything to happen. Again, being a control freak, it can be hard to let go and let God. But, I am working and learning each day to do just this. Although Peyton is inconsistent, she is at least consistent with that inconsistency. I am learning to ride the highs and the lows, the ebbs and the flows. As frustrating as they are, setbacks are part of this giant, complicated, yet beautiful puzzle. When I start to worry and doubt that I can handle what else is coming, I try to rest in the fact that I have handled and moved through everything life has thrown at me for Peyton's last 2 and a half years of life. I've got this.
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Philippians 4:13)
To read more about Peyton Lea's journey you can follow her blog posts here on Facebook.